just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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