It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
