You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
