Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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