She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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