is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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