We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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