Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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