hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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