Porn is love you can see.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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