Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
