I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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