Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone. http://tfl.nu/rlid
  Replies (69) Good night (5021) Bad night (704)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss. http://tfl.nu/o71q
  Replies (23) Good night (1384) Bad night (4840)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life. http://tfl.nu/28dk
  Replies (54) Good night (1590) Bad night (4641)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well. http://tfl.nu/7lfy
  Replies (20) Good night (7402) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (626): How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans. http://tfl.nu/e33l
  Replies (12) Good night (2612) Bad night (1073)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker. http://tfl.nu/28bg
  Replies (18) Good night (6567) Bad night (857)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point. http://tfl.nu/8d6y
  Replies (8) Good night (3469) Bad night (831)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse http://tfl.nu/nf0w
  Replies (3) Good night (1262) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day. http://tfl.nu/wa25
  Replies (7) Good night (572) Bad night (1314)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children http://tfl.nu/nt9v
  Replies (4) Good night (1348) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra http://tfl.nu/4qki
  Replies (2) Good night (1161) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (19): View more from

  Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (19): Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection http://tfl.nu/jg8t
  Replies (1) Good night (761) Bad night (207)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex http://tfl.nu/wiih
  Replies (7) Good night (760) Bad night (251)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came. http://tfl.nu/cj68
  Replies (2) Good night (296) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am. http://tfl.nu/2nux
  Replies (2) Good night (287) Bad night (489)

Randomize