i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
