didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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