i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
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He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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