4 words: hood of his car
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
