Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
it was like eating out sand paper
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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