I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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