Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
