im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
