Too much gin, very little bucket
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
