Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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