According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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