he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
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