: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize
