just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
