Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
