Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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