I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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