How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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