If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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