He uses pillows to masturbate.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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