why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
