I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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