So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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