it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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