Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I bet he comes in French.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Randomize
