So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
