fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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