Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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