I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
you traded sex for a burrito?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
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