There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Randomize
