I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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