When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
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I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
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I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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