i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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