she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize