If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize