Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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