No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
