i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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