yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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