Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
