What did we do last night that was yellow?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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